Thursday, November 23, 2006

Happy Thanksgiving!

OK, so I've been preparing and cooking for many days now, am totally unprepared and have no Thanksgiving post.

The uber-teen, in an attempt to help me with my bloggy woes, suggests I blog about her. "Tell them how pretty I am!"

There's a nice long (and totally unrelated) post for ya.

The uber-teen is pretty.

Really, really pretty.

How about Thanksgiving questions and advice?


Have any pressing Turkey Day questions? Put them in the comments. Answers and advice will follow (probably after Thanksgiving has passed and it's no longer relevant, of course).

Ah well, just be sure to ignore all of the stupid health advice you're hearing all over your TV, radio, and Internet today.

Eat too much, drink too much, watch some football...nap it off and do it again! C''s just one day...

Happy Thanksgiving!

Friday, November 10, 2006

Oh My!

Those wicked, nasty Dems have taken over the House (and it seems the Senate, too!).
I know a lot of you are depressed by this.

Insol is keeping a stiff upper lip.
Wyatt is on suicide watch.
Jimmyb is cleaning his guns, and preparing to say good-bye to them.
Doctor Phat Tony is terminating another goat to lay food in for a l-o-n-g socialist winter.

It's really rather sad...

So, sporting my best Uber-attitude, I want to present to you some of the upsides of this whole socio-political debacle.

1. The comedic opportunities are going to be almost unlimited for the next 700+ days.

2. You won't have to take your kids to horror movies any more. They can watch Nancy Pelosi on C-SPAN for 10 hours a day.

3. Terrorist are going to be so happy, they will only kill 3/4 of the people they would normally kill.

4. Abortion clinic stocks will go through the roof! As disgusting as this is, the financial implications are guaranteed to make some hell-bound investors very happy.

5. Your taxes will go up, but because the economy is going to go down, you will still end up paying the same amount, because you'll be making less money. See, it all balances out.

6. The rights of many new heretofore unrecognized minorities will now be protected. Soon, EVERYONE will have special rights. Well, except for you white men, but you know how that goes. They are even going to have affirmative action for those odd people with the one blue and one brown eye! And about darned time, too.

So cheer up folks! We have many opportunities, and the comfort that in two years, we will have our revenge!! :)
Now where is my leather Christmas outfit...?