Crazy Like a Person Who Doesn't Want a Plague

This fine Tuesday morning, August 28th, I woke to the uber-teen asking, "Well, it won't kill him will it?" in reference to making the uber-boyfriend the promised Philly cheese steak for lunch from leftovers that she forgot to refrigerate before going to bed. The sad thing is, he'll likely think about it just a second, shrug and eat it anyway.

This, just after waking the previous horrible (evil Monday) morning to pizza crust and Doritos strewn about the kitchen, the table full of unfolded laundry (and don't ya just know, shedding kitties lounging in the middle of it). I became very animated and said, "Oh my God, I can't live this way!" and would have run to choke down a "happy pill", were I one to partake in such. The uber-teen, leaning nonchalantly against the contaminated counter munching day old pizza crust, offered me the unwashed coffee cup I'd used the day before and cheerfully replied, "Oh, c'mon. Don't be so dramatic, it's not that bad. Have a cup of coffee! :)"

Last night, I dreamed I stabbed bacteria as big as your head with the new X-acto knife I'd purchased for a design project earlier in the evening. I was screaming, "4.0!" with every thrust of the blade.

However, all is not lost. This is just the beginning of my second week of this "back to school, working and parenting" thing. I will merely stay up 24-48 hours getting all my assignments completed early, don the space suit and spend the rest of the week religiously following correct contamination procedures and bulldozing my kitchen.

The uber-teen and uber-boyfriend however, ages 17 and 19, are happy as can be to continue on the dangerous path (leading to food poisoning) that they're on. They'll probably some day look back fondly upon these college years, writing happy songs/poetry about it even.

How do college students survive it all?