Friday, October 14, 2005

How Sinful Are You?

Yeah, yeah. Another quiz. Normally, I like the quizzes on this particular website, but this one's not helping the ole insomnia one bit.

My results-

"Uber, you're less sinful than the average person."

Yay me! Sounds pretty good so far...

"Still, (uh-oh) your sinful tendencies are running just below the surface and could start to affect your choices in life. For example, your sex drive could ultimately be your downfall. Beware of prioritizing sexual experiences and conquests above other things. These kinds of desires alone should not control your life."

Lies, lies! All deceitful lies! Honest. ;)

"Though you're less sinful than others, this, and the sins you scored highest on can still jeopardize the things that are most important to you. Don't let them."

Well, duh.

Seriously, they're talking about someone who spends time taking their stupid tests when suffering from insomnia (such as now).

There's an exciting path to hell for ya!

The way these questions were asked, nobody wins. Everyone's burnin' with me. Same BS different sins, ya might say.

Still, it could be worse. I could be goin' down for a Mercedes-Benz or a chocolate chip cookie.

So, how sinful are you?

Update I-

I'm not sinful, I'm naughty. Apparently naughty is it's way better than sinful. Because it's funnier.

I'm too cute to be sinful!

So, naughteh it mean I am.

Update II-

Since my post on the sinful quiz generated so much reader feedback via email (ok, three) from others (one) riddled with sinfulness (who shall remain nameless but is a yankee, just for the record), I thought the only polite southun thang to do would be to share some tips on how to become less sinful. Especially since I am officially less sinful than the average person.

Becoming Less Sinful or Maintaining Low Sinful Stats- Tips

5. Be aware that not all of that "do unto others" stuff you learned in Sunday School was just a ploy to get you to pick up the doggy poo from your neighbor's yard or mow the preacher's grass.

4. The U.S. is a nation of laws, not suggestions, but laws. Know these laws well and work hard to change those that are unconstitutional. You'll be too busy to sin very much because our elected officials pass oodles and oodles of new laws in awesome fits of whimsy.

3. If you have really sinful friend(s) you might want to think about getting new friends. However, if you're sure to tell these really sinful friends that they are probably going to hell at least once a week, you should still be cool.

2. Know your weaknesses and temptations well. Try to find ways to that are either not sinful or at least not as sinful to help ease the temptations. Example- If you are a total ho, you could limit this temptation to non-public situations and try monogamy even if not marriage.

And perhaps the most successful method of sin reduction is......

1. Choose your sins wisely. Each time you find yourself in or about to be in a sinful situation, stop and think "Do I really want to increase my sinfulness for this?" Example- You wouldn't rob a bank, risking cold hard time, for two cents. Would you?

Hope this helps everyone become less sinful (and maybe just a little naughty, c'mon nobody's perfect), just like me. :)

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