A Question For The Wise

OP-ED by The Uber-Conservative
19 January 2006


"Anyone even beginning a sentence with "Enlist European" should serve a minimum sentence of ten years as a McDonald's fry boy/girl!"






Over at The Internet Party (where voting is fun!), there be a poll concerning Iran's nuclear program.

To be more exact, the poll question is:

Iran has revived its nuclear program. What is the single most important step the U.S. should take to prevent Iran from building nuclear weapons?

The optional answers-

1: Deploy U.S. military jets/missiles to destroy Iran's nuclear facilities
2: Impose further unilateral economic sanctions against Iran
3: Work through the U.N.'s Security Council to stop the program
4: Enlist European support for military action
5: Enlist European support for diplomatic action
6: Enlist Russia and China to stop the program
7: Secretly enlist Israel's military to take out nuclear facilities in Iran
8: Other
9: Don't Know

The responses to optional answers from 74 Americans (I assume) of mixed political ideology (I'm certain)-

18% Deploy U.S. military jets/missiles to destroy Iran's nuclear facilities
17% Impose further unilateral economic sanctions against Iran
11% Work through the U.N.'s Security Council to stop the program
5% Enlist European support for military action
7% Enlist European support for diplomatic action
19% Enlist Russia and China to stop the program
11% Secretly enlist Israel's military to take out nuclear facilities in Iran
18% Other
5% Don't Know

The comments concerning this topic clearly shows that much more than a mere 5% simply "Don't Know" what the U.S. should do to prevent Iran from building nuclear weapons.

My first thoughts on the topic were "Well for the love of God let's all hope the UN Security council sends a Strongly Worded Letter. That'll teach 'em." but after reading a post from the so obviously open minded and lefty leaning Davey practically begging for a more detailed response ("So, Roee, instead of just criticizing other people's views, what do you propose we do in concrete terms?"), I decided to share some more detailed uber-conservative bits of wisdom to which Davey responded with unabashed criticism (and not one alternative suggestion, much less "concrete") which you should know by now got a good laugh out of me.

I thought I'd post these bits of uber-conservative wisdom here for your amusement (and I'm stumped on post material today).

"Though Iran's leaders are clearly fanatics, I do not think that military action is warranted and would lead to positive results." --Davey


If fanatics with nuclear weapons and the will to use them doesn't warrant military action, then I'd like to know what does.

* "Don't Know" doesn't help anyone so I'm putting you people over in the corner with a fourth of the Democrats.

* "Other" is only helpful if we know what that other is so I'll put you people in the other corner with another fourth of the Democrats.

* "Secretly Enlisting Israel's Military" is not bright because they'd be needing Iraq's air space with our insistence (hence we'd still get credit for it so not so secret after all) which would just fuel tensions and Zionist Christian/Jew conspiracy theories which many love to use as bed time stories for children in the middle east to create more terrorists so that one's out.

* "Enlist Russia and China to stop the program" would require we be high on crack and I assume we are not so that one's out.

* Anyone even beginning a sentence with "Enlist European" should serve a minimum sentence of ten years as a McDonald's fry boy/girl so that just won't do.

* "Work through the U.N.'s Security Council" to encourage the annexing of Israel or steal money for themselves, that's all they're good for so off to the corner with you to sit with another fourth of the democrats.

* "Imposing unilateral economic sanctions against Iran" hasn't worked and will serve no purpose though I suppose we could, just for our own amusement if that makes people feel good.

This leaves the only rational choice.

* Deploy U.S. military jets/missiles to destroy Iran's nuclear facilities.

Anyone too shy or silly to admit this should go sit in the corner with the remainder of Democrats who are pretending Iran isn't a threat at all and think about the fact that this is why a majority of Americans trust Republicans the most when it comes to their safety and national security. :)

As any good southern girl, I even remembered to smile sweetly after insulting and ridiculing democrats. My ma would be so proud. ;)

Anyhow, since Davey thinks "wise words from fools sound foolish to the wise" (is this some of that Zen crap or what?), pray tell me, oh wise bloggers...

What is the single most important step the U.S. should take to prevent Iran from building nuclear weapons?


Bonus wisdom from Mark over at Blogs for Bush:

"The whip hand is with us - but we do have a lot of hand-wringing bed-wetters who take Iranian bluster at face value. Fortunately, in President Bush we have a man who understands the difference between appearance and reality - and he has pledged, repeatedly, that Iran shall not have nuclear weapons. A crisis is coming, but it is a crisis we'll emerge from triumphant, as long as we don't lose our nerve, and don't give in to the siren song of defeatism."